👄Beloved Husband, I’m Not The Same Young Lady You Married!👄

Beloved Husband: I’m Not The Same Young Lady You Married!

Dear Ryan,

I Am Not The Same Young Lady I Was When I Married You.

When We Met, I Was Independent, Confident, Adventurous And Free.

I Was Ready For New Challenges, I Was Focused On My Career, I Was Dedicated To Taking Care Of My Health And Fitness.

I Wanted To Travel, Go Out To Dinners, And Have Drinks With Friends.

I Was Self-Assured, Adventurous, And Free When We Met.

I Was Excited For New Opportunities, Committed To My Work, And Committed To Maintaining My Health And Fitness.

I Wanted To Travel, Eat Out, And Drink With My Mates.

After Four Years And Two Children, I Am A Different Person.

Don't Get Me Wrong: I Wouldn't Change A Thing About Our Lives Together, Particularly Our Two Precious Children, But I Do Want You To Know That I Am Not The Same.

And I Need To Know You'll Be Able To Handle It While Still Loving Me.

You See, I Have Never “Needed” Much From Another Person, Let Alone A Man.

It Is Even Hard For Me To Admit I Need This Kind Of Reassurance From You.

But, My Love, I Am Knocked Off-Kilter.

For The First Time In My Life, I Feel Like I Can’t Set My Own Compass Straight, And I Am Constantly Teetering On The Edge Of Nostalgia, And A New Me I Haven’t Quite Yet Identified With.

In My Past, I Have Dreamt About This Beautiful Family We Now Have, But I Am Realizing I Never Quite Thought About What I Would Identify With In This Phase...

What Would Make Me, Me.

Is It The Way I Make Dinner?

Change Diapers?

The Words I Choose To Use When Disciplining Our Toddler Or Comforting Our Infant?

The Decorative Pillows I Purchase For Our Living Room?

Or Maybe It Is The Running List Of Things I Purchase, And Do Each Week To Keep Everyone In The House Fed, And Clean (The Diapers, Wipes, The Dish Soap, The Laundry, The Drop-Offs And Pick-Ups, The Food...

All The Things That Go With The Food, The Planning, The Shopping, The Cooking, The Cleaning, The Packing Of Lunches, The Cleaning Again).

Is This Me?

Is This What Makes Me Who I Am Now?

Sometimes I Feel Our House, Our Familial Life, Is Like A Shiny, New, High-Functioning Computer, And I Am The Hard Drive Just Silently Humming In The Background Getting It All Done.

You See, I Love Taking Care Of You And Our Kids And Doing All Of These Things.

I Really Do.

It’s Just That It Never Ends, It’s Constant, And Someone Always Needs Something.

And So, At The End Of The Day, When It Is Just You And Me, I Need To Reset.

And Sometimes, I Need You To Be The One To Hit The Reset Button For Me.

Dear Husband, This Is Not To Say I Do Not Recognize All You Do For Us.

Simply Stated, I Could Not Do This Without You.

Nor Would I Ever Want To; But That’s Just It.

That Is What I Am Scared Of; I Am Afraid Of Losing You.

Maybe It’s Because I Feel Like I Have Lost Part Of Myself, And I Don’t Know Yet How To Find It.

Maybe It’s Because I Constantly Feel Some Degree Less Than Desirable, Given My Constant Swap Between Yoga Pants And Pajama Pants (That Are Far From Flattering).

Maybe It’s Because I Am Somehow Lonely, Even Though There Is Another Human Literally Attached To Me At Any Given Point On Any Given Day.

Maybe It’s Because I Know What I Need From You Is Different From Before, And I Am Terrified You Won’t Be Able Give It To Me.

Dear Husband, I Need More Affection And Attention.

I Almost Hate To Admit It; It Feels Uncomfortable For Me To Say So, But It Is True.

I Know I Didn’t Need You To Tell Me I Am Beautiful Every Day, And I Am Doing A Good Job At X,Y, Or Z When We First Got Married, But I Do Now.

And I Don’t Mean That It Would Be Nice, Or That I Would Like It If You Could Please Compliment Me Every Once In A While; I Am Telling You That I Need It.

I Need You To Physically Get Up, And Walk Over To Me, And Give Me A Hug Instead Of Asking Me To Come To You.

I Need You Initiate Intimate Connections, And Be The Assertive One In Bed More Often Than I Am.

I Need You To Text Me, Or Leave Me A Note Telling Me I Am A Great Mom, And Wife Or That You Love Me.

And Then Tell Me Why.

I Need You To Sound Happy To Hear My Voice On The Phone During The Day, Because I Dream Of You Getting Home And Being With Me.

I Need You To Give Me A Big Hug, When You Get Home Because Even Though I Could Use A “Touch-Break”; I Don’t Want You To Be The One To Take The Cut.

I Need You To Look Me In The Eyes When We Talk, To Put Your Phone Down, To Make Me Feel Like I Am The Only Thing That Matters When We Are Alone, Even If It Is Just For A Few Meaningful Moments Each Day.

I Need You To Say Thank You And I Love You, And To Find Ways To Acknowledge This New Me.

I Know Who I Am Now Is Not Necessarily The Woman You Thought, You Signed Up For This Life With.

Me Neither; So, I Am Asking For Your Help.

I Want To Find Myself Again, I Want To Feel Confident, And Sure Of Myself Again.

I Know We All Need That To Happen, And I Want My Children To Reap The Benefits Of That.

And So, Dear Husband, I Am Asking You, For Right Now, While I Keep Taking Care Of All The People And Things Day In And Day Out, Would You Please Take A Little Bit More Care Of Me?

I'm Aware That The Woman You Thought, You Were Signing Up For This Life, With Is No Longer The Woman I Am.

Neither Do I; As A Result, I'm Requesting Your Assistance.

I Want To Rediscover Myself, To Regain My Self-Assurance And Self-Assurance.

I Understand That We All Need It To Happen, And I Want My Children To Learn From It.

So, Dear Husband, While I Continue To Take Care Of All The People, And Stuff Day In And Day Out, Can You Please Take A Little More Care Of Me Right Now?

No, I'm Not The Same Young Lady, I Was When We Married, But I Hope You'll Always Love Me For Who I Am Now.

And Who I'll Be Tomorrow.

And, Please Note, My Love, That I Am Doing The Same For You.

Your Wife,


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